EveryDay Matters

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Did you know that one in six boys experiences some form of sexual abuse before they reach the age of 16? And while child sexual abuse is reported more than 80-thousand times a year, the numbers of unreported cases are much greater because children are afraid to tell. It’s a difficult subject to talk about and yet, recent news stories suggest talking is the best way to release the stigma and let children know it’s OK to tell.

“So often men are expected to be the protector and the strong one and little boys are taught that’s going to be their role,” says Ken Followell. “And what happens is the predators who groom not only the young boy, but the family, build up trust and once they’ve established that trust, they tell the boy that no one’s going to believe you.”

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Ken Followell, a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, is one of those who is helping bring a voice to children and adults who’ve experienced the trauma of sexual abuse. He runs a support group for male survivors of abuse at Manatee Glens, the specialty hospital and outpatient practice in Bradenton, FL. He says there are three steps parents can take to protect a child against a predator.

Have an understanding that sexual abuse of boys actually happens.
Trust yourself, if you’re seeing something that isn’t right you need to speak up.
Have that difficult conversation with your child. Tell them it’s their body and no one has the right to touch you.

Followell is also the president of malesurvivor.org a national organization that offers support, education and advocacy for male survivors of sexual abuse. He says finding recovery after the trauma of sexual abuse is possible but life after abuse is never the same.

“Everything that happens in our life, we can choose how we’re going to take it and what we’re going to do with it,” he says. “We can get through terrible things and have joy and health and new opportunities we wouldn’t have had without it.”

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